Tuesday, May 03, 2011

Yellow Bears...



Christmas Bears...

Teacher Man by Frank McCourt




I forget sometimes that much of the world is emotionally constipated. A person may care, but they don't know what to say or do. Mr. McCourt has many troubles. Mr. McCourt has lost his family, had a miserable childhood, and little or no faith. He repeats so many instances where he wants to tell someone that he cares or that he'd like to help. He doesn't know how.. until one day he does. That made the book worth reading for me. I really enjoyed it.


There's more too.. I love an Irish Brogue, who doesn't? I listened to Mr. McCourt read this on tape. Fun. There are lots of light parts and lots of sad parts. There's regret.


In his autobiography Mark Twain complains that no one can really write one b/c they simply can't admit what a monster they've been. He's normally right about that. I edit my own journal thinking.. when I'm dead someone will read this, and by then I won't be so stupid, or petty or whatever. But subsequently, only the best of me is on paper. It's not a realistic picture. Mr. McCourt is brave and tells things you won't admire. And, I kept thinking, I would have loved to take his class, but would I want my daughter in it... hmmm? I always want her to be surrounded by people who are strong and sure in their faith, but that isn't realistic. Her faith will have to be strong enough to be around people and care about people who've lost theirs or maybe never had it.


In the end though.. my favorite moral of this tale is... It's a little embarrassing sometimes, but so freeing to tell people you love, that you care, that you're sorry, they are in your prayers, that you are thrilled for their success, that they are wonderful, that you love them.

It's only 10 AM and... Good news and hmmm.

Good news? I have been walking around with only one sock on since last night. I can't decide if I'm warm or cold and while this happened because baby l left a strawberry under one of my feet (which made another pink polka spot in my carpet... :) it seems to work.
More good news... Also, I've been to the SLC post office and back b/c I forgot to pay a bill and it's due tomorrow. The late fee would still be more than the gas, although that may not be true next month. L and I listened to A Tale of Two Cities all the way at full volume.. so it was glorious. L likes to sing the little girl part even though she doesn't know the words. It sounds pretty sweet. And, I love to drive along side the mountains. They are so beautiful to me.
Bad news... I've been in a fight w/ c .. which is a bummer. I always want her to love me and she doesn't this morning. She came in my room crying b/c she has curly hair. "Waaaah.. why must I have curly hair!??" I said very flatly, "You inherited it from me. I've always been very proud of it and happy that I looked different. You are gorgeous and if someone is telling you different, they are a jerk. Go get ready for school." I just can't go there. There are kids whose dad's don't have jobs right now. There are kids w/ no dads at all. There are hungry kids, pimply kids, fat kids, kids that can't read. There are kids with cancer and a kid who's missing one of his legs. All of these kids have to face being different at school. I just can't get all worked up that Heaven blessed my daughter with beautiful curly hair. Can you tell that I'm still bugged? Peer pressure is so stupid. If you have advice... please share because this comes up regularly and I am obviously not getting through.
Even more good news... Guess what? The library has a acquired some new recorded books... Wallace Stegner! Crossing to Safety, which is my favorite, is among the new acquisition!
Even more good news... My dad and I are taste testing powdered eggs. Which means I have to make cookies and see how they turn out. I'm going to copy a cookie I tried at Deseret Book which was sooooo yummy. So that will be fun.